Cultural Foods & Food Politics: Addressing my experience with @TheLemonBowl (PART 1)
The past few days have consisted of local YT food bloggers and influencers being called out for the harm they have caused to the marginalized community in Grand Rapids. Before you read any further, please go back and read this post in regards to how this all started. This post is essentially a continuation of how harm has been perpetuated by Liz from @thelemonbowl.
It all started when someone on Instagram tagged me in one of Liz’s posts after I started to talk about my experience with Jenny w/ the Good Eats. Within moments of being tagged, we both were blocked from her account and the post was removed (archived or deleted). It happened so quickly, I wasn’t even notified that I was tagged in the post.
You can see the post (now removed from Instagram) here. At first glance, you may wonder what’s the "big deal” with this post? I didn’t find anything particularly offensive about this post so I found it odd that she would archive or delete the post.
However, Liz does have a history of appropriating and whitewashing cultural foods from so many different cultures. It has been so normalized, I’m sure some of you may not have even noticed. Even I have become numb to her language when it came to food.
Please note that this recipe was shared on Mar. 13 which was before the shooting. However, there were several other recipes shared after the shooting with no real solidarity shown beside one repost in her IG story that I personally had seen. In addition, if you browse through her website and search ‘Asian’, you will see an influx of Asian “inspired” content all over her website.
So I decided to make an IG Reel to ask her why I was being blocked. I have not done anything to her and my initial issue with Jenny was not about Liz. I received a response from Liz the next day and I want to dissect her comments to me here.
If you prefer to watch this in video format, I do have the IG story saved as a video above.
Liz reaches out via DM, after unblocking me, asking if I would be open to a phone call. I said it would be dependent on how she answers my question on why I was blocked.
Let’s start with the misspelling of my name.
First, "Darlene". Spelling names incorrectly is something that is easy to do and I have made that mistake before. However, I want to let you all know why this is annoying, specifically to a BIPOC.
I have an ENGLISH name for a reason. It was my parents' hope that it would make my life easier — to sound "American" enough.
Historically, our names have been so butchered due to laziness, we have almost given up on correcting people. You can see this happening with the media misspelling and/or abbreviating the names of the victims from the Atlanta shooting. It is the bare minimum to spell someone’s name correctly.
The crazy thing is, my first name is not an Asian name where it should even be spelled incorrectly as it is literally spelled out in my Instagram handle.
Point 2:
“I just got off a phone call with __________.”
To me, this was an unnecessary alignment. This person had nothing to do with me in this current situation other than being my friend. It came off to me as, “Hey, this person was willing to talk to me on the phone so you should too.”
I also suspect it was also a way for her to ensure that I wouldn’t share screenshots of our conversations. This is why I replied back with a direct question and she was still pushing to control how this conversation will go down. I understand the fear of being screenshotted, as I am the CEO of receipts. But, I will explain why a little bit later why having this conversation online is important.
Point 3:
She starts to minimize what she did. “I blocked you for a few hours”…”then unblocked you this morning.”
She brings up “the Jenny thing”. I’m not sure why she choose to center herself in “the Jenny thing”. The issue with Jenny didn’t have anything to do with her. My assumption is she felt like she fit into the category of YT food bloggers and food influencers. If this is the case, then I would assume she is somewhat aware that she is problematic.
Point #4
She assumed I hated her and her “intent” was not to call me out. This is a weird shifting of blame. She doesn’t have anything to call me out on. Intent does not equal impact.
Please note: People are aware when they are blocked. Also, when you block someone it does unfollow them when you unblock them. Regardless, for full transparency, I had unfollowed Liz a long time ago but she was still responding to my IG stories here and there.
In addition, we’re adults. If you believed I hated you, why would you not ask me prior to being called out on blocking me? She has had ample opportunities to address this prior to blocking me.
Point #5
“More so I was trying to figure out if I did something” — playing dumb as if she is not aware of how or why someone would not follow her. This is a way to alleviate herself of any accountability in her role of perpetuating harm. She then expresses concern that if she did something wrong she would like to talk about it….now. Why now?
Point #6
“__________ and I were saying how social media takes away so much tone and context.” Once again, she realigns herself with a person that had nothing to do with these issues, as if, this would help me think Liz is being reasonable. She goes on to explain social media, tone, context, and reiterate why a phone call is important.
Here’s the thing about that —
I will agree in normal circumstances, I do think a conversation in real life would be much more productive and beneficial offline due to tone and context. However, these women have PLATFORMS. These women are doing harm ONLINE. So to discuss these issues in private when everything else has been unfolding publicly, would be a disservice to everyone involved. It would allow your followers and/or supporters to forget what you have done with zero accountability. It would also imply that I’m the only one you needed to apologize to and that is not the case.
I will welcome offline or private conversation when they put in the work.
I would also like to share some slides from Kendra of @soon.hee.lee. She did an amazing job dissecting the harm that Liz has contributed to the AAPI community even though it is not Kendra’s (or my responsibility) to educate Liz on the harm she has done. As Kendra stated, Google University is free.
For those of you who may not be familiar with how an influencer may make money online, it can be from a number of things such as affiliate links, discount codes, ads, brand endorsements, and etc.
I do not have a problem with Liz or any other influencers trying to make money via social media with these methods, as it is their job. What I do have a problem with is how she went about it. Her language around it is problematic.
She actively encourages people not to shop at Asian markets because it is “overwhelming and intimidating”. Who is it overwhelming and intimidating for? If we rewind back to March 2020, the fear around supporting any Asian place of business was real whether you all realized it or not. Chinatown in Chicago had a decrease of 40% in sales and NYC had approximately over an 800% increase in hate crimes.
The restaurant industry is already tough enough but to throw in this type of language during a pandemic where we had a President that was actively contributing to the harm like calling COVID-19, “Kung Flu” or the “China Virus” perpetuated racism and xenophobia even further.
This post was posted on her website on Nov. 29, 2020.
The MSG myth was solely created to be anti-Asian and yet, after being called in to correct her mistake, her answer was to delete the post. She could’ve used this opportunity to redact what she said and re-educate her following. Instead, she chose to bury her head in the sand.
What is “any Asian Style recipe”? Seriously, what is it? Why do we lump Asian people into one giant category? Do we do this with Westernize foods? No.
You can read more about this issue here.
I really need you to understand the next slide — like really let it sink in. We are not saying you can’t cook, share, sell any Asian food (or any other cultural foods) that is different from your own.
Enter Superiority Complex —
“To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t a huge fan of it until I started making my own version at home.”
“my egg drop soup is fresh, fragrant, and well balanced.”
Just why? Why would contribute and imply that yours is so much better and “less salty” as if yours is any healthier?
As a community, we have tolerated Liz and kept quiet about her for far too long. I, too, initially unfollowed her and left it at that. However, in light of the escalation of violence towards marginalized communities, I am compelled to call her into accountability like Kendra.
From my understanding, not only is she racially ignorant on so many levels, she is well-connected within the community and has been able to masquerade with enough BIPOC people to skate by. This is not okay. In addition, I am also understanding that she has done personal harm to people that once considered her friends.
Like Kendra said:
“As a reminder: please do not just tag or send posts/stories to BIPOC asking us to weigh in on an issue. That can be triggering, retraumatizing, and exhausting.”
And, I am EXHAUSTED. I’m tired of grieving and this stuff being brushed under the rug.
What I would like to see:
I encourage you to share your stories one day when you are ready. I encourage you to call her in and hold her accountable. I am no one to her. She needs to hear from people that are close to her and people that were once her friend so she cannot just brush us all off.
I want an apology and accountability from Liz publicly. I shouldn’t even have to hold her hand thru this and tell her how to apologize properly either. I want people who are still friends with her on social media to either talk to her in-person and/or comment on her posts. I want you all to continue applying pressure until this is resolved. I want her to reevaluate her language on social media and her blog. I want her to address it.
Resources:
If you want to further support, I encourage you to research anti-Asian history, from the Chinese Exclusion, Japanese American Internment Camps, to the bastardization of Asian food, the whitewashing and co-opting of Yoga, and so much more.
If you are looking to donate, we do have a few local chapters for Asian Americans here:
https://www.asiancommunitygr.org/
https://www.gofundme.com/f/stopasianhate-gr-asianpacific-foundation.
Question your understanding of “authentic” food
How SEO Perpetuates Cultural Appropriation & White Supremacy in Food Blogging by Billy Green
Digging into the Racial Politics of ‘Ugly Delicious’ by Rachel Kuo
Dear Food Bloggers, your “African Peanut Stew” recipes are PROBLEMATIC by Afia
The Lemon Bowl’s Non-Apology (Part 2)
After this conversation, Liz went offline on Instagram for a few days. On Facebook, her content was still going out presumably as scheduled — which did include at least one Asian “inspired” recipe to her FB story.
When she returned to Instagram, she chose to ignore (she will deny this later) a multitude of people asking her when she will be addressing the harm that she has caused while she continues to engage with her other followers as if nothing is going on. She does this over the course of two days with two separate posts on Instagram. Her Instagram stories consisted of her vacation (during a pandemic where she doesn’t address any safety guidelines she’s abiding by) and promotion of her upcoming virtual class.
Then, on Saturday night, April 10th, around 9 PM, she sends me a link to her “apology”.
Here’s the problem with her “apology”:
Some of you may not be fully aware of the inner workings of social media and blogging. I have posted a resource above by Billy Green about how bloggers and influencers use SEO to their advantage — sometimes monetizing off of marginalized communities’ pain for financial gain.
An example of this is how Liz strategically decided to release her apology in a blog format even though our interactions have been on Instagram. This forces people to actually type in and search for this blog post driving traffic to her website.
(Note her URL is “from-my-heart-being-intentional-about-the-cultural-histories-of-food” is SEO-friendly and preferred.)
After we expressed our disappointment in the lack of an apology and that this is extremely opportunist of her, not to mention how deeply offensive and not adequately accessible (meaning, as an influencer with 39.5K followers, she is well aware that dropping links into her comments would not be clickable but she did it anyway), she finally makes another post.
This post did not contain the “apology” or any updates to the apology when there were comments that gave her a blueprint of what her apology was lacking. In addition, she easily could’ve converted it into a carousel that was swipeable. Instead, she continues to add a call-to-action driving the traffic back to her website.
Her apology is posted above so you don’t have to drive more traffic to her website.
Breaking down her non-apology:
Within her first paragraph, I could tell she full-on missed the entire point and is not ready to accept how she has harmed us. She states “in lieu of a new recipe” as if she’s doing us a favor by dropping this “apology” and does not even acknowledge who she has harmed. In this instance, it is Kendra, myself, and the AAPI community — in which she was incapable of spelling my name correctly, once again.
She believes she is being “questioned” for the “sharing of (and adapting of) recipes based on those of other cultures and ethnicities”. Not only is this incorrect, she leaves out all of the contexts. We are not upset with her for sharing or adapting recipes. We are frustrated with the lack of solidarity and harmful language surrounding how she shares her recipes.
There has been a pattern of how she represents these recipes like how she claims authenticity, says hers are better than the way dishes are traditionally prepared, spreading the misinformation about MSG (which is heavily rooted in anti-Asian racism), and encouraging people not to engage with the culture, such as visiting the Asian supermarkets portraying them in a way that perpetuates negative and untrue stereotypes.
She goes on to say that she is “a person with deep ethnic” roots, in attempts to minimize her harm by attempting to assimilate with marginalized communities for empathy. She either does not know the difference between nationality, race, and ethnicity OR she is intentionally misrepresenting to confuse people.
At the end of the day, she is still a white woman. Liz adding in her religion (being Jewish) and Syrian ties is literally the same as when someone says they are Irish or Italian. This still means you’re racially Caucasian.
She further insists that she is engaging with each of us when she literally has not for several days and was pressed to acknowledge us. This is how she is attempting to gaslight us even though she is actively sitting there liking the comments of those who are actively agreeing with her, praising her, AND gaslighting us — which makes your “apology” even more empty than how it began.
Not once through her “apology” did she acknowledge what the harm was. There was zero accountability. If anything, she continually shifted blame, tried to share the blame, and centers herself into this situation as if she is the victim.
She goes on to explain how she is honoring food even though multiple people have explained that this is not “appreciation” rather, it is appropriation. She explains these are moments of “food discovery” which has been explained to her that these cultural and traditional food has been around long before she “discovered” them.
Beyond that, she shifts blame so that she doesn’t have to acknowledge the harm that she has done. She essentially generalizes this into an industry issue that she happened to get wrapped in — as if she’s very unaware, which is very much not the case.
Even within her caption, she reiterates what she believes is the issue and completely absolves herself from any accountability. She aligned herself with her “many friends who are part of or advocate” for marginalized populations, suggesting that gives her a pass to not be a better ally to all marginalized identities.
Ironically, none of these “friends” were in her comments essentially reinforcing this statement. If anything, the only people in her comments that were in support of her are predominately white women who continued to contribute to the erasure of our experience and gaslit us. I will add a few of the problematic comments so you can see what that would like.
She does not have the full context of the issue yet felt the need to tell Liz she didn’t need to apologize. Reinforcing the idea that Liz was never wrong and then gaslighting the rest of us asking for accountability by suggesting we are trying to cancel Liz.
No one is cancelling Liz. What Kim_nort is unaware of is how many private conversations and gentle conversations, in general, had to be had before we started discussing this from a public standpoint since Liz is harming marginalized communities online and making money off it.
Camille doesn’t understand that Liz never apologized and then blames those that were harmed by Liz’s actions as if we actually lacked emotional capacity.
This woman doubles down on harm and tone polices multiple times under her own comment. She suggested this should’ve been handled privately even though she had zero idea that we tried. I’ve explained to her that asking someone to be held accountable for their words and actions is not public shaming especially when Liz chose to double down on her harm over the course of 8 days. Asking us to give her more grace and forgiveness implies we didn’t and haven’t. And before she invalidates our experience, I advise her to stop speaking on something she will never experience and to stop taking up space when she isn’t the one being harmed.
This thread is from someone that works with Liz. This is what a lack of intersectionality looks like. She demands BIPOC women to erase our racial experience to abide by whyte feminism for the sake of womaness.
You will notice a pattern with these problematic comments is they lack context bc Liz never gave them context. To people who are not familiar with what is happening, it looks like we’re attacking her for one mistake. It is incredibly misleading. This is a pattern in her behavior. Her problematic and harmful language can be found all over her blog. Liz has been able to bury these types of issues before but now people are commenting back to her and her followers who blindly following and defending without understanding the situation.